Okay, she will be 10 in like t-minus 2 weeks. Holy Crap! Where did the time go? Yesterday I was putting her in cute dresses and pig tails, today she is dressed in her own fashionable clothes, with an attitude to boot! She is becoming a tweener, Dear God! Any one have a Dalorean in the garage? Do I seriously have to relive puberty again? The first damn time was enough! Okay, I know, I have a solution! I'll send her to an all-girls boarding school and see her again when she is 18. WHAT? Not a good idea? Okay, Okay!
SO as of now, she screams in my face, tells me to tell her I don't like her, slams the door, stomps off to her room. Oh wait, my two year old does that. OH PRAISE GOD SHE IS REGRESSING! I can have my sweet baby back. What? I doesn't work that way? Then what the f**k do I do now? I am terrified of her going through this.
I was lucky to get through it the first time, now I have to relive it on the other end? The raging hormones, the "buds", the "you know what"! Oh please, please let the both of us just sleep right through it. Please, I have 8 more years of this, why? Why does she have to go through this? I don't know how I can stand by watching her "grow", watching boys come in and out of the picture (hopefully she will think boys have cooties and they never come in the picture, that being said, I hope girls don't either). I now, I know, I'll send her to nuns school. They do have that right?
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Red Pancakes
Seeing life through my children's eyes is amazing. In our bed one sunny morning, Liam asked for red pancakes. What an awesome memory this boy has. He remebered the green pancakes that he had on St. Patricks Day. I am happy that the little things in life that make my children happy are becuase of me.
I was once told by a dear friend of mine that everyday is kids day. I sat back to think about what she meant. She brought it up in a conversation we were having about a day I set aside for my kids to do whatever they wanted. Lex chose lunch and a pedicure, Liam wanted red pancakes. When I told her this she said, well everyday is kids day in my house. What is that suppoosed to mean? Was that a diss on me? My parenting style?
No, it was an eye opener to a childhood. A childood that I remember well. The best memories were days spent with my grandparents. These were "my days". I lived for the weekend when I spent the night at their house, and my favorite dinner was prepared and served under candle light, when ice cream was always served before bed, and on the t.v. was my favorite BBC show. These were my "red pancake" days. The days were stress, laundry, home work and cleaning is set aside to just hang with the kids. Make it special, show them theyare thought of, show them they are loved. I do this everyday don't get me wrong. But these "red pancake" days are the special days.
I was once told by a dear friend of mine that everyday is kids day. I sat back to think about what she meant. She brought it up in a conversation we were having about a day I set aside for my kids to do whatever they wanted. Lex chose lunch and a pedicure, Liam wanted red pancakes. When I told her this she said, well everyday is kids day in my house. What is that suppoosed to mean? Was that a diss on me? My parenting style?
No, it was an eye opener to a childhood. A childood that I remember well. The best memories were days spent with my grandparents. These were "my days". I lived for the weekend when I spent the night at their house, and my favorite dinner was prepared and served under candle light, when ice cream was always served before bed, and on the t.v. was my favorite BBC show. These were my "red pancake" days. The days were stress, laundry, home work and cleaning is set aside to just hang with the kids. Make it special, show them theyare thought of, show them they are loved. I do this everyday don't get me wrong. But these "red pancake" days are the special days.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Preschool hunting for MOM?
So today is the day. I am taking Liam to go look at a preschool. He is so excited because he thinks he will be able to ride a bus to school. Oh how my heart breaks when I think about when he realizes that is not the case. I knew this day would come. I just didn't think it would be so soon. Alexis was three when she started preschool, and I was in college. I would joke to her that mommy and Lexi have designated home work time after school. Of course she didn't get what I meant, she was just thrilled to be hanging with me. Now I am experiencing de ja vu. I will still be in college when Liam strts preschool.
Now it is Liam's turn. When the hell did this happen? It feels like yesterday I was breastfeeding him and changing diapers, now he is going to the bathroom by himself, and is having actually adult conversations with me. He has been by my side since the day he was born, and I am proud to admit he is a mini me. But school, already? I am almost a year into my bachelors program, and when he starts, both my babies and I will all be in school. Is that weird?
I started this blog to talk about what is was like growing up with my daughter, but at 26, I still feel like I am growing up. I am at a different stage in my life, my values and morals are different since Lex was born, and everyday feels like my childhood all over again (minus the inattentive, unloving droids I call my parents). SERIOUSLY, I am doing college level work, but when Alexis comes home and asks me for help with her home work I can't help her all the time. I feel so dumb. I have to start reading her text books (yes, they still use those things) and notes out loud to help her. Is this what my life has become? Is my adult hood becoming the childhood I never had? With every child will I grow with them? I kinda like it. But, some days I wish I was ahead of the game.
Now it is Liam's turn. When the hell did this happen? It feels like yesterday I was breastfeeding him and changing diapers, now he is going to the bathroom by himself, and is having actually adult conversations with me. He has been by my side since the day he was born, and I am proud to admit he is a mini me. But school, already? I am almost a year into my bachelors program, and when he starts, both my babies and I will all be in school. Is that weird?
I started this blog to talk about what is was like growing up with my daughter, but at 26, I still feel like I am growing up. I am at a different stage in my life, my values and morals are different since Lex was born, and everyday feels like my childhood all over again (minus the inattentive, unloving droids I call my parents). SERIOUSLY, I am doing college level work, but when Alexis comes home and asks me for help with her home work I can't help her all the time. I feel so dumb. I have to start reading her text books (yes, they still use those things) and notes out loud to help her. Is this what my life has become? Is my adult hood becoming the childhood I never had? With every child will I grow with them? I kinda like it. But, some days I wish I was ahead of the game.
Friday, March 25, 2011
I finally did one.
I have been thinking for many years, and with the advice form counselors, that I need to write a book telling my life story. Well, I am not much of a creative writer, and I often forget that I have started a journal and the story never gets on paper. But, I thought if I started a blog, maybe I might remember to jot down my ideas and the stories of my life. This is because facebook has me hooked to this technological contraption called a computer, and since I can't seem to get off of it, I might as well put my time to some good use.
Time, now that is something I have alot of of. Um, yeah right. I am a busy wife and mom to two beautiful children. Alexis, who I will call the baby who saved me for pending doom in the Walsh house, is 9 turning 10 in June. Holy crap, I am going to have a teenage daughter in 3 years (MOUTH GAPED OPEN AND PANIC HAS SET IN)! Liam my youngest, is the baby that changed who I am, and who I want to be. He is 2 and will be 3 in July.
We all know that children change our lives, and that their existence in this world makes a powerful impact. BUT, I feel different the way I look and feel about my offspring. I became pregnant with Alexis at 15 (please, stop judging) and I am glad I did. Of course she was planned, but not THIS EARLY. I always wanted to be a mom. My Honey (who is my grandma) was a nanny and I was raised by her and was taught how to be a caretaker at a young age. When I found out about the pregnancy, I was not scarred. Something inside of me knew I could take on this new challenge in my life. I was prepared. I moved out and in with Jason, who is the father of the mentioned offspring. I stayed in school and in June of 2001, Alexis Elizabeth made her glorious arrival. At 16, I made the choice to have a unmediated birth (but while being somewhat informed about drugs during labour, I was not informed of how Dr.s like to do anything to speed up the process, so I did end up with drugs). At 16, I only knew of one way to feed a baby, by breastfeeding. I never even thought of formula feeding. Alexis saved me. Why you ask? She saved my from going down a bad road of petty teenage crap, she saved me from my parents, I finished high school because of her, I went to college because of her. My life was because of her.
Liam, my dear baby Liam. He is a a joy to have in my life! He was planned ON TIME, and what a difference a planned on time pregnancy makes. His gender was even planned. NO, NO,NO, I did not spend trillions of dollars to make sure I had a boy, I just did some old fashion tricks to help Jason's male sperm (he would kill me if he saw this)swim faster than the females, lol. Liam Jackson was born in July of 2008, and his birth changed me forever. I had a horrible experience in the hospital and his birth prompted me to do start doing research on natural birth/parenting. I have made bad decisions (getting Liam circ'd) because I chose not to properly inform myself. I hate myself for mutilating my son. But I am glad that I get to learn from what I did wrong, and hopefully change lives form the information I have gathered since he was born. He was breastfeed until he was 14 months, and I wish I never stopped. H ecahnged my view on life, and my view on parenting.
I wake up every day learning how to be a better mom. I like to say I am not just raising two children, I am also raising myself. I am growing up mommy.
Time, now that is something I have alot of of. Um, yeah right. I am a busy wife and mom to two beautiful children. Alexis, who I will call the baby who saved me for pending doom in the Walsh house, is 9 turning 10 in June. Holy crap, I am going to have a teenage daughter in 3 years (MOUTH GAPED OPEN AND PANIC HAS SET IN)! Liam my youngest, is the baby that changed who I am, and who I want to be. He is 2 and will be 3 in July.
We all know that children change our lives, and that their existence in this world makes a powerful impact. BUT, I feel different the way I look and feel about my offspring. I became pregnant with Alexis at 15 (please, stop judging) and I am glad I did. Of course she was planned, but not THIS EARLY. I always wanted to be a mom. My Honey (who is my grandma) was a nanny and I was raised by her and was taught how to be a caretaker at a young age. When I found out about the pregnancy, I was not scarred. Something inside of me knew I could take on this new challenge in my life. I was prepared. I moved out and in with Jason, who is the father of the mentioned offspring. I stayed in school and in June of 2001, Alexis Elizabeth made her glorious arrival. At 16, I made the choice to have a unmediated birth (but while being somewhat informed about drugs during labour, I was not informed of how Dr.s like to do anything to speed up the process, so I did end up with drugs). At 16, I only knew of one way to feed a baby, by breastfeeding. I never even thought of formula feeding. Alexis saved me. Why you ask? She saved my from going down a bad road of petty teenage crap, she saved me from my parents, I finished high school because of her, I went to college because of her. My life was because of her.
Liam, my dear baby Liam. He is a a joy to have in my life! He was planned ON TIME, and what a difference a planned on time pregnancy makes. His gender was even planned. NO, NO,NO, I did not spend trillions of dollars to make sure I had a boy, I just did some old fashion tricks to help Jason's male sperm (he would kill me if he saw this)swim faster than the females, lol. Liam Jackson was born in July of 2008, and his birth changed me forever. I had a horrible experience in the hospital and his birth prompted me to do start doing research on natural birth/parenting. I have made bad decisions (getting Liam circ'd) because I chose not to properly inform myself. I hate myself for mutilating my son. But I am glad that I get to learn from what I did wrong, and hopefully change lives form the information I have gathered since he was born. He was breastfeed until he was 14 months, and I wish I never stopped. H ecahnged my view on life, and my view on parenting.
I wake up every day learning how to be a better mom. I like to say I am not just raising two children, I am also raising myself. I am growing up mommy.
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