So today is the day. I am taking Liam to go look at a preschool. He is so excited because he thinks he will be able to ride a bus to school. Oh how my heart breaks when I think about when he realizes that is not the case. I knew this day would come. I just didn't think it would be so soon. Alexis was three when she started preschool, and I was in college. I would joke to her that mommy and Lexi have designated home work time after school. Of course she didn't get what I meant, she was just thrilled to be hanging with me. Now I am experiencing de ja vu. I will still be in college when Liam strts preschool.
Now it is Liam's turn. When the hell did this happen? It feels like yesterday I was breastfeeding him and changing diapers, now he is going to the bathroom by himself, and is having actually adult conversations with me. He has been by my side since the day he was born, and I am proud to admit he is a mini me. But school, already? I am almost a year into my bachelors program, and when he starts, both my babies and I will all be in school. Is that weird?
I started this blog to talk about what is was like growing up with my daughter, but at 26, I still feel like I am growing up. I am at a different stage in my life, my values and morals are different since Lex was born, and everyday feels like my childhood all over again (minus the inattentive, unloving droids I call my parents). SERIOUSLY, I am doing college level work, but when Alexis comes home and asks me for help with her home work I can't help her all the time. I feel so dumb. I have to start reading her text books (yes, they still use those things) and notes out loud to help her. Is this what my life has become? Is my adult hood becoming the childhood I never had? With every child will I grow with them? I kinda like it. But, some days I wish I was ahead of the game.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Friday, March 25, 2011
I finally did one.
I have been thinking for many years, and with the advice form counselors, that I need to write a book telling my life story. Well, I am not much of a creative writer, and I often forget that I have started a journal and the story never gets on paper. But, I thought if I started a blog, maybe I might remember to jot down my ideas and the stories of my life. This is because facebook has me hooked to this technological contraption called a computer, and since I can't seem to get off of it, I might as well put my time to some good use.
Time, now that is something I have alot of of. Um, yeah right. I am a busy wife and mom to two beautiful children. Alexis, who I will call the baby who saved me for pending doom in the Walsh house, is 9 turning 10 in June. Holy crap, I am going to have a teenage daughter in 3 years (MOUTH GAPED OPEN AND PANIC HAS SET IN)! Liam my youngest, is the baby that changed who I am, and who I want to be. He is 2 and will be 3 in July.
We all know that children change our lives, and that their existence in this world makes a powerful impact. BUT, I feel different the way I look and feel about my offspring. I became pregnant with Alexis at 15 (please, stop judging) and I am glad I did. Of course she was planned, but not THIS EARLY. I always wanted to be a mom. My Honey (who is my grandma) was a nanny and I was raised by her and was taught how to be a caretaker at a young age. When I found out about the pregnancy, I was not scarred. Something inside of me knew I could take on this new challenge in my life. I was prepared. I moved out and in with Jason, who is the father of the mentioned offspring. I stayed in school and in June of 2001, Alexis Elizabeth made her glorious arrival. At 16, I made the choice to have a unmediated birth (but while being somewhat informed about drugs during labour, I was not informed of how Dr.s like to do anything to speed up the process, so I did end up with drugs). At 16, I only knew of one way to feed a baby, by breastfeeding. I never even thought of formula feeding. Alexis saved me. Why you ask? She saved my from going down a bad road of petty teenage crap, she saved me from my parents, I finished high school because of her, I went to college because of her. My life was because of her.
Liam, my dear baby Liam. He is a a joy to have in my life! He was planned ON TIME, and what a difference a planned on time pregnancy makes. His gender was even planned. NO, NO,NO, I did not spend trillions of dollars to make sure I had a boy, I just did some old fashion tricks to help Jason's male sperm (he would kill me if he saw this)swim faster than the females, lol. Liam Jackson was born in July of 2008, and his birth changed me forever. I had a horrible experience in the hospital and his birth prompted me to do start doing research on natural birth/parenting. I have made bad decisions (getting Liam circ'd) because I chose not to properly inform myself. I hate myself for mutilating my son. But I am glad that I get to learn from what I did wrong, and hopefully change lives form the information I have gathered since he was born. He was breastfeed until he was 14 months, and I wish I never stopped. H ecahnged my view on life, and my view on parenting.
I wake up every day learning how to be a better mom. I like to say I am not just raising two children, I am also raising myself. I am growing up mommy.
Time, now that is something I have alot of of. Um, yeah right. I am a busy wife and mom to two beautiful children. Alexis, who I will call the baby who saved me for pending doom in the Walsh house, is 9 turning 10 in June. Holy crap, I am going to have a teenage daughter in 3 years (MOUTH GAPED OPEN AND PANIC HAS SET IN)! Liam my youngest, is the baby that changed who I am, and who I want to be. He is 2 and will be 3 in July.
We all know that children change our lives, and that their existence in this world makes a powerful impact. BUT, I feel different the way I look and feel about my offspring. I became pregnant with Alexis at 15 (please, stop judging) and I am glad I did. Of course she was planned, but not THIS EARLY. I always wanted to be a mom. My Honey (who is my grandma) was a nanny and I was raised by her and was taught how to be a caretaker at a young age. When I found out about the pregnancy, I was not scarred. Something inside of me knew I could take on this new challenge in my life. I was prepared. I moved out and in with Jason, who is the father of the mentioned offspring. I stayed in school and in June of 2001, Alexis Elizabeth made her glorious arrival. At 16, I made the choice to have a unmediated birth (but while being somewhat informed about drugs during labour, I was not informed of how Dr.s like to do anything to speed up the process, so I did end up with drugs). At 16, I only knew of one way to feed a baby, by breastfeeding. I never even thought of formula feeding. Alexis saved me. Why you ask? She saved my from going down a bad road of petty teenage crap, she saved me from my parents, I finished high school because of her, I went to college because of her. My life was because of her.
Liam, my dear baby Liam. He is a a joy to have in my life! He was planned ON TIME, and what a difference a planned on time pregnancy makes. His gender was even planned. NO, NO,NO, I did not spend trillions of dollars to make sure I had a boy, I just did some old fashion tricks to help Jason's male sperm (he would kill me if he saw this)swim faster than the females, lol. Liam Jackson was born in July of 2008, and his birth changed me forever. I had a horrible experience in the hospital and his birth prompted me to do start doing research on natural birth/parenting. I have made bad decisions (getting Liam circ'd) because I chose not to properly inform myself. I hate myself for mutilating my son. But I am glad that I get to learn from what I did wrong, and hopefully change lives form the information I have gathered since he was born. He was breastfeed until he was 14 months, and I wish I never stopped. H ecahnged my view on life, and my view on parenting.
I wake up every day learning how to be a better mom. I like to say I am not just raising two children, I am also raising myself. I am growing up mommy.
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